Small talk is a BIG deal!

posted in: Blog, Motivation | 1

I’ve always been a talker. But, like many others, I become shy around people that I don’t know. I’ve learned how to cope with this by having ‘small talk’ with complete strangers. I know it sounds weird, but, it’s so beneficial not only to your own mental health, but to another person’s as well.

photo(15)“A conversation is much more than an exchange of facts and ideas. It is an exchange of energy. What many people miss is that when you know how to make small talk, it means you can create a positive exchange of energy.

When you’re making small talk, you want to focus more on being friendly and positive than on picking the right topic or saying the right things. Smile, relax, joke around, be spontaneous and be silly.

Last but not least, keep in mind that small talk is not a destination. It’s just a temporary station.”

Small talk not only cheers you up, but it works the same for another person. You have the ability to turn someone’s day around with a brief, warm conversation.

By no means am I telling you to ambush a random person and strike up a conversation. Use your time wisely while waiting in line at a store, or if you happen to be next to someone in an aisle – just make a complimentary comment. The small talk conversation doesn’t have to be awkward where you initiate it with a “Hi.” Small talk is just that. Small. It is based on a comment or compliment that makes you a more approachable person.

I remember one time it was pouring rain when I was leaving Walmart, and there was a woman running next to me as we headed to our vehicles, I quickly said something about the weather not being summer-like at all. First of all, the woman looked absolutely shocked that out of the blue, some random woman was talking to her. I’m not going to lie, there’s a brief second of awkwardness because most people don’t know how to take a stranger’s kindness. But, the awkwardness doesn’t happen all of the time and the more you improve your ‘small talk’ skills, your confidence in communicating will soar. The woman quickly recovered, laughed and made a quick statement back. The greatest part? Telling someone you don’t even know to have a great day. I always end the miniature conversations with a pleasant goodbye.

Make someone’s day and restore their faith in humanity. Break down the walls of hatred, anger, sadness and hostility. Pleasantries go a lot further than a few words.

* People Skills Decoded

Thoughts, comments, questions? Please email me,

Become part of the CASA of CGS family!

 If you’re interested in learning more about CASA of CGS, email Cumberland County ranked last place in Child Welfare in New Jersey. Let’s stand up for our children and do something about it! Visit for more information and follow us on Facebook for daily updates and information.


 Do you know of a Community Superhero?

Help CASA of CGS recognize the effort put forth by them to improve our community! Email Jennifer Kaysen at Be sure to share this post with your family and friends on Facebook and Twitter to reach a bit further and find our Superheroes!

  1. Donna aka Jenn's Mom

    Great blog Jenn… definitely got your Grandmom and I in you! I love to talk out of the blue to strangers and I learned that from Gmom! Just to see them smile and appreciate the fact that not all the world is as bad as it seems at times is worth that “feel good” feeling.

Leave a Reply